Saturday, October 2, 2010

Ghostbusters (1988)

The Real Ghostbusters was a kick ass cartoon show. It was also the first thing I was ever obsessed with. I remember being three years old and HAVING to have every single figure. Even the figures that were just the old figures with new paint. Every single god damn one of them. And I'm pretty sure I did have them all until my dumb jerk dog chewed them up. That was probably the saddest day of my young life, but I think if I had played this game as a child, I'm sure I would have ended up hating the Ghostbusters because of how bad it was.  And I'm sure I would have broken my NES. Which would have made that an even sadder day.

Thankfully it was YEARS before I even knew a Ghost Busters game even existed. It was in 1998. I was getting into NES collecting (yes I've been doing this shit for twelve goddamn years.) and among the carts I was given by my mother who had gotten it from a friend was Ghost Busters. (also X-Men. The disappointment I felt that day was so bad) I remember playing it, and being frustrated and incredibly bored (I can honestly say this is the only game that honestly bores me. Like seriously.) and deeming it a pile of shit. In fact I smashed this game with a hammer (along with X-Men) and didn't play it for years later (until I bought another copy because I went insane and had to have every single stupid NES game. I'm close to that goal now... whoopee), I played it again for the first time in years tonight and yeah, I'm going with my thirteen year old self opinion on it, It's a pile of god damn shit.

Another thing I should talk about because it kind of relates to this game, is how I wrote (a very bad) review for this game for groxx of NES Player. And someone who liked this game got all mad because I *gasp* cursed in it. A teenager CURSING. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. OH MY GOD STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES. And yes, he liked the game. (I don't really care that he did give it a positive review. It just proves the Different Strokes theme song right in that "It takes all kinds to move the world") Still, I was pissed that that jerk got my thing taken down. So if you are out there jerklord, eat a dick. eat all of the god damn dicks. (Well it seems my poor memory was wrong. What a surprise. it seemed groxx just put the review there because he was so passionate about the game. I'm still leaving this paragraph up so I can trick people into thinking I wrote more. Also I like that Different Stroke joke. I'm sorry guy who wrote the review!)


Okay finally getting into this game. It's kind of weird. First off you have to buy your weapons (yes buy them. I'm pretty sure Egon and Ray MADE the goddamn weapons in the movie and didn't have to fucking buy them) then go around the town getting to buildings that flash red. Then drive around on the dullest god damn street ever. I swear I fell asleep looking at this stupid street. So much grey that it hurt my poor eyes. Then you catch ghosts, to get money to buy more stuff before the ZUUL building opens up so you can get into there. This is a big flaw in the stupid game. You will get hit by the cars and lose money. You will run out of gas and have to start all over. That's not fucking fun. At all.


I've never had the patience to even get inside the Zuul building but according to people, it gets worse, mostly because your Ghostbusters are slow ass motherfuckers. Still I can't believe it somehow gets worse. That boggles my mind.

If you couldn't guess, I'm not a fan of this game, I put it on my top ten worst games for the console, probably at 8 or 9. If my thirteen year old self had known there were games worse than this I'm pretty sure he would have commited harikari. So I'm glad he didn't, because I'm, you know, glad to be alive.

Avoid this god damn game. At all costs.

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