Monday, May 30, 2011

Fuck You, Colonel Computron...


I really think people of the early 1980s thought that computers were a god damn gift from heaven that with them you could do fucking anything... and that's talking about computers from the early 1980s.. The ones that are so hilariously outdated 30 years later. Anyway, I'm discussing peoples weird thoughts about computers because I'm going to talk about Colonel Computron... the worst villain of the Flash. Ever.

The Flash has the greatest set of bad guys ever. Seriously, I love every single one of them. Except this loser. This weirdly drawn, uninteresting, ugly looking loser. I can't even blame the creator of this guy because he wrote some damn fine Flash stories... and created Rainbow Raider and the Eliminator... two rather enjoyable Flash villians... and those guys had personality... which is something this asshole lacks.

That's pretty much the only reason I can't stand this guy, he's fucking boring. That's it, give him some more personality and he could be an interesting character, but that's not going to happen now because they killed him off and I doubt any human being is clamoring for the return of Colonel Computron... and if you are, fuck you. Also it took about 6 or 7 years for them to reveal the identity of this guy... 7 years and only because they pretty much forgot about him. That's right. This guy was forgotten, which just goes to show how damn boring he really was. I can't stress how boring this guy was, so I will just mention it again. Colonel Computron was so boring that I forget what his actual powers are, all I know is that he was one of the three suspects a fat man, a fat woman, or a teen aged girl... and I don't care enough to look up to see who his real identity was, I'd rather save those 5 seconds searching wikipedia. and do something better with them. Like well, anything!

In short, fuck Colonel Computron... and I'm sorry you had to read this horrible thing.. I'll try to write something better next time.

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